It's one of those things I'll never understand.
Evereyone looks for it, everyone wants it. Some people find it, some people use it (like it's some toy), some people just don't find it at all and some people, like myself, find it when they never wanted to.
It's one of those indecipherable mysteries!
I just can't figure it out!
If it hurts so much, why do people want it so bad?
For the last three years I've been crushing (ok, way more then crushing) over this guy (who BTW is so NOT even my tipe!) that doesn't even know I exist.
We talked a couple of times but he always seems to forget my existence right when our "two-second-long" conversations end up!
I don't talk to him for arownd two months now.
He doesn't even look at me.
My friends try to convince me that he notices me, that he's interested. But I know it's not true.
Can you blame him?
I'm just a strange, wierd, ugly and uninteresting girl!
I know my friends don't wanna hurt me, I'm not mad at them for lying to me. They just want me to be happy! But sometimes I wish they would just tell me what I don't wanna hear, to see if I would fall into reality. But deep inside, I know it wouldn't change anything. I just wanna belive it would.
At night, when I'm trying to sleep, I can't help it to think of him.
To imagine how it would be to have him next to me.
To hug him.
To kiss him.
To have him love me.
Then, I shake my head (like that would make the thoughts go away!) and try to sleep, with no success, obviously.
I guess there are some things that, even if I try as hard as I can, I just can't change.
I just wish the pain would go away...
Today's motto: "Fixing a broken heart it's not a synonymous of putting bandages on it"
Today's song: Same Mistakes from One Direction (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvc1tsIEdts)
Today's pic:
Hearts Hugs and Kisses.
Ella <3
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